À voir sur YouTube : une vidéo autour de « masturbate »

L’interprétation de Dr. Doug Weiss sur « masturbate »

Une nouvelle vidéo de Dr. Doug Weiss vient d’être ajoutée sur YouTube
portant sur « masturbate »:

Nous avons repéré cette vidéo il y a peu, et elle générait du trafic. Le nombre de Likes indiquait: 5064.

Reasons Why People Masturbate and Its Effects on the Brain « Appelez le 719-278-3708 ou envoyez un courriel à Heart2heart@xc.org pour être programmé avec un entraîneur ou un conseiller de récupération sexuelle. Pour la récupération accélérée, le centre de conseil cardiaque à cœur propose des intensives de 3 et 5 jours avec des conseillers certifiés dans ce domaine. Cliquez ici pour télécharger un bloqueur de porno: https://tinyurl.com/bdfa68fd passez nos 6 types de toxicomanes sexuels gratuits sur sexaddict.com Vous pouvez également télécharger notre ebook gratuit « 6 types de toxicomanes sexuels » La masturbation est une question permanente et même une dépendance au sein de notre société (et dans le monde) depuis de nombreuses années. Alors que de nombreux hommes et femmes se masturbent, ce sujet est rarement parlé. Beaucoup ne comprennent même pas pourquoi ils le font ou comment cela les affecte. Dans cette vidéo, le Dr Doug Weiss, psychologue et auteur agréé, passe en revue plusieurs raisons pour lesquelles les gens se masturbent et comment cela affecte leur cerveau. Voulez-vous arrêter de vous masturber? Vous pouvez regarder notre vidéo sur la façon de le faire: https://youtu.be/xuwmyvxwtq8 Êtes-vous prêt à passer à l’étape suivante et à obtenir de l’aide? Planifiez un appel avec un thérapeute ou un entraîneur de la reprise sexuelle aujourd’hui en donnant un appel au bureau du Dr Weiss au 719-278-3708. Cliquez ici pour télécharger un bloqueur de porno: https://tinyurl.com/bdfa68fd Ressources mentionnées dans la vidéo: Fitness émotionnel: https://www.drdougweiss.com/product/emotional-fitness-book/ Final Freedom: https://www.drdougweiss.com/product/Final-freedom-Book/ sexuel: TEMPLAT https://www.drdougweiss.com/product/sexual-templates-dvd/ Visitez le site Web du Heart To Heart Counseling Center à www.drdougweiss.com Vous pouvez également visiter www.sexaddict.com ou nous appeler au 719-278-3708. Si vous êtes un adolescent qui s’occupe de cela, ainsi que la dépendance au porno et au sexe, vous pouvez consulter cette vidéo pour des conseils supplémentaires: https://youtu.be/hha2a4-y9le Vous pouvez également regarder la série de classe de 5 heures de 5 heures à Drdougweiss.com/class Suivez-nous sur Facebook ici: HTTPS: //www.Facebook.com/drdougweiss/ pour la brisée: //www. https://www.drdougweiss.com/product/shattering-sexualization-how-to-stop-sexualizing-and-objectitify-others-video-download/ pour des informations sur la conseil en mariage et les intensives, rendez https://www.drdougweiss.com/store/ Vous pouvez contacter le Dr Weiss via son site Web, www.drdougweiss.com ou sur son Facebook https://www.facebook.com/drdougweiss/ par téléphone au 719-278-3708 ou par courrier électronique à heart2heart@xc.org. (Tagstotranslate) Doug Weiss ».

YouTube est un excellent espace pour découvrir des vidéos touchant une grande variété de sujets, allant de la culture à des réflexions personnelles, tout en assurant que chaque utilisateur puisse interagir dans un cadre respectueux et sûr.

Décrypter les dimensions de la dépendance à la masturbation et ses répercussions

Examiner les différents aspects de la masturbation et ses manifestations

La masturbation est une activité sexuelle qui, dans des limites raisonnables, contribue à réduire le stress et à améliorer la connaissance de soi. Cependant, une pratique habituelle peut être source de difficultés.

Observer les signes d’un comportement addictif

Les signes de dépendance incluent une fréquence instinctive, ainsi qu’une perte de contrôle qui peut interférer avec d’autres domaines importants, notamment les relations amoureuses.

Analyser les effets sur la santé psychologique et physique

L’abus de masturbation, souvent lié à la consommation de pornographie, entraîne une stimulation répétée du système dopaminergique, ce qui peut conduire à des déséquilibres tels que l’éjaculation précoce, une fatigue accrue ou un sentiment d’insatisfaction dans les relations sexuelles.

Analyser les avantages d’un sevrage réussi

Illustrer l’évolution vers une meilleure gestion de la santé mentale

La cessation de cette habitude conduit généralement à une hausse de l’énergie, à une humeur améliorée et à une concentration renforcée.

Insister sur la voie vers un bien-être durable

Réduire la dépendance peut offrir des avantages à long terme dans les aspects personnels, professionnels et sociaux.

Illustrer l’évolution vers des relations plus saines et plus équilibrées

Les rapports avec un conjoint évoluent, créant une connexion émotionnelle et physique plus forte et plus épanouissante.

Planifier un chemin d’action pour cesser

Proposer des solutions pratiques pour réduire cette activité

• Identifier les facteurs déclencheurs : Prenez note de ce qui provoque l’envie de céder.
• Créer des objectifs bien définis : Suivez un plan progressif ou le mouvement « nofap » pour rester abstinent.
• Remplacer par d’autres pratiques : Découvrez de nouveaux loisirs ou engagez-vous dans une activité physique.

Indiquer les étapes essentielles pour éviter les rechutes

• Se déconnecter de la pornographie : Bloquez les accès aux contenus explicites.
• Structurer vos journées : Créez une routine avec des activités régulières et bien organisées.

Faire ressortir la nécessité de l’entraide sociale

• Obtenir des conseils d’un sexologue : Un professionnel peut fournir une aide précieuse.notamment cette sociétépour le monde entier.
• Faire partie de groupes de soutien : Partager ses objectifs avec d’autres est un excellent moyen de rester motivé.

Masturbation et rapports intimes : relever le défi du changement

Pour de nombreuses personnes, hommes et femmes confondus, mettre fin à la masturbation peut représenter un véritable défi. Si cette activité est souvent vue comme une pratique saine et normale pour mieux comprendre sa sexualité, elle peut toutefois devenir problématique lorsqu’elle prend une place instinctive et empiète sur d’autres sphères de la vie, comme le travail ou la santé mentale.

Explorer les raisons de l’extension de cette pratique

Disserter sur les aspects psychologiques et émotionnels

L’angoisse, le stress ou un manque de contentement dans d’autres domaines peuvent inciter à cette pratique instinctive.

Analyser les conséquences de la pornographie sur les comportements

La pornographie joue un rôle central. Elle stimule fréquemment le désir de se masturber et peut entraîner une perception erronée de la sexualité.

Observer l’effet de la solitude sur les désirs

Le désir insatisfait et la solitude, qu’elles soient relationnelles ou personnelles, peuvent pousser à une pratique compulsive.

En fin de compte

Cesser la masturbation excessive est un processus lent mais réalisable. Un plan structuré et un soutien adapté permettent de surmonter ce challenge et d’atteindre une vie plus équilibrée, pleine d’objectifs plus enrichissants.

Accédez directement à la vidéo sur YouTube grâce à ce lien :
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#Pourquoi #estce #masturbe #Raisons #pour #lesquelles #les #gens #masturbent #ses #effets #sur #cerveau #Doug #Weiss

Retranscription des paroles de la vidéo: [Music] hi i’m dr doug weiss and today’s topic is why do i masturbate so many people masturbate but they’re very rarely do they sit down and actually think why am i doing this how does this impact my present or my future we’re going to address some of these issues because there’s several things about masturbation that you can learn about today now i’ve done more masturbation histories which mean asking men and women when they start to masturbate what kind of frequency use of pornography etc than any man in the world you’re gonna learn a lot but you have to stay tuned [Music] why do i masturbate that is very important question for you to kind of assess now i’m not in any way having a judgment about this for you i want you to relax i just want to have an open conversation with you about this i’ve worked with thousands of men and women who have had masturbation issues and they had to discover the reason why and what i found out is most people never ask themselves why do i masturbate well that’s what we want to talk about now before we get into that let’s talk about what happens when you masturbate because this is exciting neuroscience has really developed a lot over the last 15 20 years and now we know a lot about what happens when you masturbate now when you masturbate you have an orgasm when you have an orgasm you get the highest level of endogenous opiates um keflan’s endorphins etc hits the excitement center of your brain the prefrontal cortex and boom you get this incredible orgasmic rush this thing is better than any drug you can do orgasm is the most powerful uh chemical experience you will have neurologically bar none okay so but what happens when you have that chemical release whatever you’re physically looking at at the point of that release you literally glue to hunger for crave and want to repeat so let’s go back to pavlov’s dog ring the bell feed the dog ring the bell feed the dog and you actually set up a neurological attachment to whatever you are masturbating to so imagine this now remember i’ve done thousands of masturbation histories men and women have masturbated to all kinds of fantasies and fetishes and objects and animals and crazy stuff right so one guy when he was masturbating he was made fun of he lives on a farm and the bed would make noise you’d go bang bang bang bang bang everyone heard it they’d laugh at him so he figured another plan so he’d go outside past the barn and he would masturbate we could look up or look down well he was looking down so he’s looking down because remember this is a young guy there’s no beer belly right in the way so he was actually seeing his boots well he created an entire boot fetish he had a boot collection so to speak from here to the end of the stage probably six feet high okay he never had sex without his boots on he literally attached to the boots during sexual encounters now this story might sound funny to you but i can tell you hundreds of other stories of attaching to certain things especially if you’re getting into pornography or fantasy and you can create scenarios that are almost impossible to recreate but you glue to them you hunger for them you crave and you want to repeat them this is the gift of sex you know if you’re in a marriage you have sex with your spouse and the more you have sex with them the more you want to have sex with them the more you attach to them you connect to them you glue to them it’s that bond uh that chemical bond and psychological bond spiritual bond that can hold a help hold the marriage together okay so this is the most powerful thing you possess so you should know why you’re using it and how to use it because if you are starting to masturbate to scenarios that you can never fulfill well that’s going to set you up for failure in your marriage or future relationships because you’re going to seek something that some person made up in a studio that’s not real it’s by actors and actresses so you want to be really really careful but that’s what happens in your brain now the gift of a sexual release is wow you get this physical release oh the afterglow okay and if you’re a man you get these chemicals sent to your brain to put you to sleep and you sleep like a baby that physical release is real all of us who’ve ever had an orgasm know that it’s like wow it feels so good so relaxing okay and then that’s the reason why some people masturbate to get that chemical feeling to get that after go feeling now if you have a spouse and you’re masturbating okay maybe you’re using masturbation in a different way and we’ll get to that now the other thing that happens during masturbation is a psychological attachment now this took me a while to figure out when i was working with men and women that it wasn’t just the physical release it was the messaging it was the voice of the fantasy or the pornography of being wanted being powerful being in control being controlled having excitement or risk connected to sex they had all these kind of scenarios psychological scenarios that that was the only place they could get that need met and so they were getting a real need met in a false way but they were literally attaching to that scenario to that voice of being wanted now remember most people start masturbating as teenagers you got pimples you’re not that maybe popular and so you go to the fantasy world for solace for for hope for love for encouragement to say that you’re okay to feel good maybe just even feel touched if you’re in a family where there’s not a lot of touch you might just masturbate just to be touched okay so the psychological dependency can really occur and you know that if it’s you it’s already happening because you’re looking for a certain voice you’re looking for a certain scenario again and again and again and again and again and again and that would tell me that okay there’s some psychological interplay as to why you’re motivated to masturbate as often as you do are to what you do because when i do a masturbation history i not only ask about the frequency okay which is one factor i ask about what kind of pornography or fantasy they have because that tells me what they’re neurologically attached to and what they’ll be triggered to in the real world so if you masturbate to a certain physical type of person then you’re going to want that type of person whether that type of person in reality happens to be a nice person or a good person or not it won’t matter because the features will attract you to them because those are the features that you masturbate to so when you masturbate you are setting up a sexual template and we actually have a video on that called sexual templates it’s uh it’s quite long but it’ll help you understand how you create sexual templates and the impact it can have on your life i would strongly recommend that you get that if if you want to further understand how you create your own sexual preferences how you create your own sexual desires and i’ve had people who have spent thousands of masturbation times with one thing and then they stop that and they move to another type of sexual reinforcement with a real person and we’re able to create a sexual happy satisfying life with them so we’re neuroplastic sexually okay which means that you can adapt and change and grow i see it happen in every direction over 35 years now the other reason that some people masturbate is to medicate when you masturbate to medicate you are oftentimes uh unable to feel feelings and so they get all jacked up but if you masturbate the feelings go away and you feel better but you don’t learn how to develop emotionally there’s a great book out there called emotional fitness strongly recommend that if you’re using masturbation to medicate if you’ve been sexually abused abandoned neglected have some kind of injury that you are using masturbation to medicate then that’s also another reason you might be uh masturbating um if you are in a lot of stress or in a situation where you’re feeling overwhelmed and don’t know how to deal with it or sad or grief or some kind of pain and you’re using masturbation to get out of it that’s possible another reality is some people have bipolar manic depression or psychothemic disorder and they’re chemically trying to modulate their brain it’s not the emotions they’re trying to switch they’re trying to switch their brain and they found out in their teen years if they masturbate they can either go to sleep or they feel energized and they’re neurologically trying to re-stabilize so if that’s you you want to see a psychiatrist and get on something that can help you stabilize without masturbation i remember i had a client who was trying to stop from masturbating and he just wasn’t successful and he went to see a psychiatrist found he was bipolar well as soon as he got on his bipolar medicine he was able to resist masturbating and actually maintain a better relationship with his wife so that’s a reality for some people and you might not have thought about that now another reason you might be masturbating and this might be a little challenge for some of you is avoiding real intimacy because see when you masturbate to fantasy and pornography you don’t need to have emotional skills you don’t need to be emotionally present you need to look in someone’s eyes you don’t need to manage the interpersonal complexity of giving them pleasure satisfying them finding out what they need being able to do that and receive pleasure at the same time you just disconnect go to another world it’s all about you in the other world you’re worshipped it’s all what you want they say what you want they do what you want in the real world you have to negotiate and your lack of skill in intimate sexuality versus object sexuality can make you want to avoid real sex and actually prefer masturbation i’ve worked with many men and women who would rather masturbate than have sex with their spouse because sex with their spouse costs them emotionally so if you’re avoiding emotional cost and intimacy then you also might be struggling with intimacy anorexia google that term intimacy anorexia is the active withholding of spiritual emotional and sexual intimacy from your spouse you might have sex but you’re not making love they’re not feeling connected they feel married and alone and let me give you quickly those characteristics you’re too busy for your spouse you blame your spouse you withhold love you withhold spiritually withhold feelings you withhold sexuality or disconnected during sexuality um uh you will use anger or silence’s way to control you’ll be critical towards your spouse sometimes you control our money but your spouse will always feel like a roommate i feel alone i feel like we’re not really married if you’re having those conversations google intimacy anorexia there’s lots of materials and books and even other youtube videos on that topic just check into that if that is you now lastly you may have an addiction because of the endogenous opiates that hit your brain you could have a chemical addiction to masturbation and if that’s combined with a psychological dependency on that voice it’s really really something you want to address now do you have an addiction let me ask you have you tried to stop have you tried to stop and failed have you promised yourself to stop and failed have you had consequences your husband or wife are angry or frustrated or they feel disappointed when they find out that you’re lying about this again okay but then you go back and use anyway have you limited other activities like you’re not the person used to be you’re not as social or physically active or other things because you’re spending so much time trying to get to the porn or the masturbation okay if you have an addiction you know you do okay i’m a recovering sex act i’ve been sober for over 36 years i have not masturbated in 36 years and i’ve helped literally tens of thousands of people get into recovery from sexual addiction if you have a sex addiction not everyone who masturbates does but you do know if you do you’re going to need some help i strongly recommend start with this book the final freedom go to sex addict scxaddict.com there’s lots of resources there’s telephone groups there’s counseling for you on this issue you don’t have to be stuck if you’re using masturbation as an addiction you really want to get that addiction in remission because it’s going to ruin your life it’s going to hurt you like any addiction alcohol drugs sex food sex is something you can be addicted to and and when you are you’ll need some path of recovery so that you can really have the best sex of your life so you can really be connected emotionally and spiritually to the person you’re making love to you can be present now i can tell you i’ve worked with over 5 000 people a lot of men who when they learn how to have sex correctly and they’re connecting to their spouse they all come back to me about six or eight weeks later and say dr weiss i’m having the best sex of my life i thought it was about positions and places but really it’s about connection and when i bring my heart into the sexual act with my spouse i feel more satisfied after than ever before with pornography or with prostitutes or with other things that you could be addicted to in sex addiction so i hope that our conversation today has been helpful because masturbation is one of those kind of taboo topics so many people do it but no one talks about it intelligently and asks the question why are you doing this okay i hope you’ve discovered maybe some ideas that can help you to think through this if you need help hearttark counseling center is here for you the phone number 719-278-3708 there’s lots of resources if you just want to talk to someone about your process that could be really helpful short term and long term now if you’ve yet to subscribe to our channel please hit the subscribe button we have so many helpful information things that you can get into and you’ll get notified about that if you have a question about this and we get a lot of questions about masturbation go ahead and put it in the box send it to us we’ll get to it as soon as possible and and wait for your response you’ll get it probably within a business day or two so we care about you we want you to be as well and healthy sexually as possible so go have a great sex life until we see you again take care [Music] you .

Déroulement de la vidéo:

0.27 [Music]
0.56 hi i’m dr doug weiss and today’s topic
2.639 is
3.6 why do i masturbate so many people
6.399 masturbate but they’re very rarely do
8.32 they sit down and actually think why am
11.12 i doing this
12.4 how does this impact my present or my
14.48 future
15.519 we’re going to address some of these
16.48 issues because there’s several things
18.24 about masturbation that you can learn
20.4 about today
21.68 now
22.72 i’ve done more
24.16 masturbation histories which mean
26.32 asking men and women when they start to
28.48 masturbate what kind of frequency use of
30.64 pornography etc than any man in the
33.92 world
34.88 you’re gonna learn a lot but you have to
36.399 stay tuned
46.49 [Music]
53.12 why do i masturbate that is very
55.52 important question for you to kind of
57.28 assess now i’m not in any way having a
60.0 judgment about this for you i want you
61.76 to relax
63.28 i just want to have an open conversation
64.96 with you about this
66.479 i’ve worked with thousands of men and
68.32 women who have had masturbation issues
71.6 and they had to discover the reason why
73.52 and what i found out is most people
75.759 never ask themselves why do i masturbate
80.479 well that’s what we want to talk about
82.479 now before we get into that let’s talk
84.159 about what happens when you masturbate
86.24 because this is exciting neuroscience
88.4 has really developed a lot over the last
90.159 15 20 years and now we know a lot about
93.28 what happens when you masturbate now
96.32 when you masturbate you have an orgasm
98.64 when you have an orgasm you get the
100.24 highest level of endogenous opiates um
102.96 keflan’s endorphins etc hits the
105.119 excitement center of your brain the
106.399 prefrontal cortex and boom you get this
108.72 incredible orgasmic rush this thing is
111.84 better than any drug you can do orgasm
114.56 is the most powerful
116.719 uh chemical experience you will have
119.119 neurologically bar none okay
122.079 so
123.36 but what happens when you have that
126.24 chemical release whatever you’re
128.16 physically looking at at the point of
130.08 that release you literally glue to
133.04 hunger for crave and want to repeat
136.239 so let’s go back to pavlov’s dog ring
138.4 the bell
139.76 feed the dog ring the bell feed the dog
141.76 and you actually set up a neurological
143.36 attachment
144.64 to whatever you are masturbating to
148.8 so imagine this now remember i’ve done
151.2 thousands of masturbation histories
153.76 men and women have masturbated to all
155.28 kinds of fantasies and fetishes and
157.76 objects and animals and crazy stuff
159.84 right so one guy
162.16 when he was masturbating
164.16 he was made fun of he lives on a farm
165.599 and the bed would make noise you’d go
167.12 bang bang bang bang bang everyone heard
169.12 it they’d laugh at him so he figured
171.36 another plan so he’d go outside past the
173.76 barn and he would masturbate we could
176.0 look up or look down well he was looking
177.68 down so he’s looking down because
179.12 remember this is a young guy there’s no
180.8 beer belly right in the way so he was
183.28 actually seeing his boots
185.04 well he created an entire boot fetish he
187.28 had a boot
189.04 collection so to speak from here to the
190.879 end of the stage probably six feet high
193.44 okay he never had sex without his boots
195.04 on he literally attached to the boots
197.44 during sexual encounters
200.0 now this story might sound funny to you
202.4 but i can tell you hundreds of other
204.0 stories of attaching to certain things
206.56 especially if you’re getting into
208.319 pornography or fantasy and you can
210.799 create scenarios that are almost
212.48 impossible to recreate but you glue to
215.599 them you hunger for them you crave and
217.599 you want to repeat them
219.36 this is the gift of sex you know if
221.68 you’re in a marriage you have sex with
223.28 your spouse and the more you have sex
225.2 with them the more you want to have sex
226.319 with them the more you attach to them
227.599 you connect to them you glue to them
229.12 it’s that bond uh that chemical bond and
232.239 psychological bond spiritual bond that
234.48 can hold a help hold the marriage
236.08 together okay so this is the most
238.319 powerful thing you possess so you should
240.4 know why
241.68 you’re using it and how to use it
244.239 because if you are starting to
246.879 masturbate to scenarios that you can
248.56 never fulfill well that’s going to set
250.4 you up for failure in your marriage or
252.0 future relationships because you’re
253.68 going to seek something that some person
256.16 made up in a studio that’s not real it’s
259.359 by actors and actresses so you want to
261.919 be really really careful but that’s what
263.28 happens in your brain
265.52 now
266.479 the gift of
269.04 a sexual release is wow you get this
272.0 physical release oh
273.759 the afterglow okay and if you’re a man
276.96 you get these chemicals sent to your
278.32 brain to put you to sleep and you sleep
280.16 like a baby that physical release is
283.36 real all of us who’ve ever had an orgasm
285.68 know that it’s like wow it feels so good
288.08 so relaxing
289.52 okay and then that’s the reason why some
291.759 people masturbate to get that chemical
293.6 feeling to get that after go feeling now
296.639 if you have a spouse and you’re
298.08 masturbating
299.6 okay maybe you’re using masturbation in
301.919 a different way and we’ll get to that
303.919 now
305.039 the other thing that happens during
306.639 masturbation
308.72 is a psychological attachment now this
311.52 took me a while to figure out when i was
313.039 working with men and women that it
314.96 wasn’t just the physical release
317.6 it was the messaging it was the voice of
321.199 the fantasy or the pornography of being
323.68 wanted
324.72 being powerful
326.32 being in control
328.0 being controlled
330.0 having excitement or risk connected to
332.24 sex they had all these kind of scenarios
335.36 psychological scenarios that that was
337.759 the only place they could get that need
340.24 met
341.28 and so they were getting a real need met
343.199 in a false way but they were literally
345.52 attaching to that scenario to that voice
348.56 of being wanted now remember most people
350.72 start masturbating as teenagers you got
352.72 pimples you’re not that maybe popular
355.12 and so you go to the fantasy world for
357.68 solace for for hope for love for
361.36 encouragement to say that you’re okay to
363.919 feel good maybe just even feel touched
366.88 if you’re in a family where there’s not
368.0 a lot of touch
369.28 you might just masturbate just to be
371.44 touched
372.56 okay so the psychological dependency can
376.16 really occur and you know that if it’s
377.919 you it’s already happening because
380.319 you’re looking for a certain voice
382.639 you’re looking for a certain scenario
384.8 again and again and again and again and
386.479 again and again
388.08 and
389.36 that would tell me that okay there’s
391.84 some psychological interplay as to why
394.0 you’re motivated to masturbate as often
395.759 as you do are to what you do because
397.6 when i do a masturbation history i not
399.44 only ask about the frequency okay which
401.68 is one factor i ask about what kind of
403.759 pornography or fantasy they have because
405.84 that tells me what they’re
406.56 neurologically attached to and what
408.319 they’ll be triggered to in the real
409.599 world so if you masturbate to a certain
411.759 physical type of person then you’re
414.16 going to
415.44 want that type of person whether that
417.12 type of person in reality happens to be
419.199 a nice person or a good person or not it
421.599 won’t matter because the features will
423.28 attract you to them because those are
425.12 the features that you masturbate to so
427.52 when you masturbate you are setting up a
429.28 sexual template and we actually have a
431.039 video on that
432.72 called sexual templates it’s uh it’s
435.12 quite long but it’ll help you understand
437.199 how you create sexual templates and the
439.199 impact it can have on your life i would
440.72 strongly recommend that you get that if
442.56 if you want to further understand how
444.88 you create your own sexual preferences
447.12 how you create your own sexual desires
449.599 and i’ve had people who have spent
451.599 thousands
452.8 of masturbation times with one thing and
455.36 then they stop that and they move to
457.199 another type of sexual reinforcement
459.68 with a real person and we’re able to
461.52 create a sexual happy satisfying life
463.759 with them so we’re neuroplastic
467.039 sexually okay which means that you can
469.919 adapt and change and grow i see it
471.84 happen in every direction over 35 years
475.12 now
476.16 the
476.96 other reason that some people masturbate
479.84 is to medicate
482.08 when you masturbate to medicate you are
484.319 oftentimes
485.919 uh unable to feel feelings and so they
488.16 get all jacked up but if you masturbate
490.0 the feelings go away and you feel better
491.52 but you don’t learn how to develop
493.199 emotionally there’s a great book out
495.039 there called emotional fitness strongly
497.52 recommend that if you’re using
498.879 masturbation to medicate
501.44 if you’ve been sexually abused abandoned
503.36 neglected have some kind of injury that
506.56 you are using
508.8 masturbation to medicate then that’s
511.28 also another reason you might be uh
513.519 masturbating um if you are in a lot of
516.56 stress or in a situation where you’re
518.64 feeling overwhelmed and don’t know how
519.919 to deal with it or
521.44 sad or grief or
523.279 some kind of pain
524.72 and you’re using masturbation to get out
526.32 of it that’s possible another reality is
528.88 some people have bipolar manic
531.12 depression or psychothemic disorder and
533.6 they’re chemically trying to
537.2 modulate their brain
539.04 it’s not the emotions they’re trying to
540.48 switch they’re trying to switch their
541.76 brain and they found out in their teen
543.68 years if they masturbate they can either
545.6 go to sleep or they feel energized and
547.76 they’re neurologically trying to
549.12 re-stabilize so if that’s you you want
551.68 to see a psychiatrist and get on
553.44 something that can help you stabilize
554.88 without masturbation i remember i had a
557.04 client who was
559.04 trying to stop from masturbating
561.04 and he just wasn’t successful and he
563.839 went to see a psychiatrist found he was
565.2 bipolar well as soon as he got on his
567.04 bipolar medicine he was able to resist
569.92 masturbating and actually maintain a
571.92 better relationship with his wife so
574.08 that’s a reality for some people and you
575.92 might not have thought about that
577.92 now
579.76 another reason you might be masturbating
581.6 and this might be a little challenge for
583.2 some of you
584.56 is avoiding real intimacy because see
587.04 when you masturbate to fantasy and
588.24 pornography you don’t need to have
590.08 emotional skills you don’t need to be
591.76 emotionally present you need to look in
593.279 someone’s eyes you don’t need to manage
595.12 the interpersonal complexity of giving
598.48 them pleasure satisfying them finding
600.24 out what they need being able to do that
602.48 and receive pleasure at the same time
604.399 you just disconnect go to another world
605.839 it’s all about you in the other world
607.6 you’re worshipped it’s all what you want
609.2 they say what you want they do what you
610.56 want in the real world you have to
612.16 negotiate
614.0 and your lack of skill in
616.16 intimate sexuality versus object
618.24 sexuality can make you want to avoid
621.12 real sex and actually prefer
623.36 masturbation i’ve worked with many men
626.16 and women who would rather masturbate
628.24 than have sex with their spouse because
630.079 sex with their spouse costs them
632.24 emotionally so if you’re avoiding
634.399 emotional cost and intimacy then you
636.88 also might be struggling with intimacy
638.32 anorexia google that term
641.12 intimacy anorexia is the active
642.56 withholding of spiritual emotional and
644.399 sexual intimacy from your spouse you
646.88 might have sex but you’re not making
648.64 love they’re not feeling connected they
650.88 feel married and alone
652.959 and let me give you quickly those
654.32 characteristics you’re too busy for your
655.92 spouse you blame your spouse you
657.68 withhold love you withhold spiritually
659.68 withhold
660.64 feelings you withhold sexuality or
662.64 disconnected during sexuality um
665.6 uh you will use anger or silence’s way
668.079 to control you’ll be critical towards
669.92 your spouse
671.12 sometimes you control our money but your
672.88 spouse will always feel like a roommate
674.64 i feel alone i feel like we’re not
676.079 really married if you’re having those
677.76 conversations google intimacy anorexia
680.079 there’s lots of materials and books and
682.0 even other
683.04 youtube videos on that topic just check
685.68 into that if that is you
687.36 now lastly
689.76 you may have an addiction
692.079 because of the endogenous opiates that
693.92 hit your brain you could have a chemical
696.64 addiction to masturbation and if that’s
698.959 combined with a psychological dependency
700.88 on that voice it’s really really
703.36 something you want to address now do you
705.36 have an addiction let me ask you have
707.2 you tried to stop
709.279 have you tried to stop and failed
711.68 have you promised yourself to stop and
714.079 failed
715.04 have you had consequences your husband
716.88 or wife are angry or frustrated or they
718.88 feel disappointed when they find out
720.48 that you’re lying about this again
723.12 okay but then you go back and use anyway
726.32 have you limited other activities like
728.24 you’re not the person used to be you’re
729.76 not as social or physically active or
731.68 other things because you’re spending so
733.6 much time trying to get to the porn or
736.48 the masturbation
738.16 okay if you have an addiction
740.88 you know you do
742.24 okay i’m a recovering sex act i’ve been
744.16 sober for over 36 years i have not
746.399 masturbated in 36 years and i’ve helped
748.88 literally tens of thousands of people
750.88 get into recovery from sexual addiction
753.68 if you have a sex addiction not everyone
755.76 who masturbates does but you do know if
758.16 you do
759.6 you’re going to need some help i
760.959 strongly recommend
762.959 start with this book the final freedom
765.44 go to sex addict scxaddict.com
769.92 there’s lots of resources there’s
771.6 telephone groups there’s counseling
774.16 for you on this issue you don’t have to
776.079 be stuck if you’re using masturbation as
778.399 an addiction you really want to
781.12 get
782.079 that addiction in remission because it’s
784.24 going to ruin your life it’s going to
785.279 hurt you like any addiction alcohol
787.36 drugs sex food sex is something you can
789.68 be addicted to and and when you are
792.32 you’ll need some path of recovery so
794.16 that you can really have the best sex of
795.76 your life so you can really be connected
798.32 emotionally and spiritually to the
800.24 person you’re making love to you can be
802.24 present
803.36 now i can tell you i’ve worked with over
804.8 5 000 people
806.72 a lot of men
808.0 who when they
809.839 learn how to have sex correctly
812.88 and they’re connecting to their spouse
814.48 they all come back to me about six or
816.0 eight weeks later and say dr weiss i’m
818.079 having the best sex of my life
821.519 i thought it was about positions and
823.279 places but really it’s about connection
825.36 and when i bring my heart into the
827.199 sexual act with my spouse i feel more
829.279 satisfied after than ever before with
831.199 pornography or with prostitutes or with
833.519 other things that you could be addicted
835.04 to in sex addiction
836.639 so
837.44 i hope that our conversation today has
839.36 been helpful because masturbation is one
841.519 of those kind of taboo topics
844.24 so many people do it but no one talks
846.56 about it intelligently
848.48 and asks the question why are you doing
850.56 this
852.079 okay i hope you’ve discovered maybe some
854.88 ideas that can help you
856.48 to think through this if you need help
859.6 hearttark counseling center is here for
861.12 you
861.92 the phone number 719-278-3708
865.68 there’s lots of resources if you just
867.36 want to talk to someone about your
869.279 process that could be really helpful
871.76 short term and long term now if you’ve
874.32 yet to subscribe to our channel please
875.839 hit the subscribe button
877.839 we have so many helpful
881.839 information
883.199 things that you can get into and you’ll
884.639 get notified about that
886.56 if you have a question about this and we
888.0 get a lot of questions about
889.12 masturbation
890.399 go ahead and put it in the box send it
892.079 to us we’ll get to it as soon as
893.279 possible and and wait for your response
895.76 you’ll get it probably within a business
897.76 day or two so we care about you we want
900.399 you to be as well and healthy
902.56 sexually as possible so go have a great
905.839 sex life
907.12 until we see you again
908.8 take care
911.21 [Music]
918.639 you
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